Big thanks to Lawrence King for 106 articles. He has been volunteering his time since 2011 to bring you King’s Corner and his insightful words will be missed!
“Time to Move On”
I started this column in 2011 when I decided it might be of interest to our readers if I shared my 36 years of experiences as a teacher, administrator, and coach. Along the way, I also shared educational stories of interest from other sources. I always identified where these articles came from, or if I didn’t know the origin, put “Author Unknown.” Now 106 stories later, I feel it is time to move on. Based on the feedback I received from emails or talking to people in person, I have included, as my last article, the one with the most interest and responses from our readers, which were all positive. It came from my May 2018 Trailblazer column.
“If it is to be, it is up to me”
As a retired teacher and coach, I’m concerned about the new philosophy that is out there that says that children are entitled to everything and no longer need to earn it. Teachers can no longer give failing grades and all comments on report cards must be positive, even when the student is doing nothing! A case in point is the high school teacher in Edmonton who was suspended by his principal for giving a zero to a student who failed to hand in an assignment, even after the student was given extra time to complete the project. The principal had previously told his staff that zeros were not allowed, even though several staff members had voiced their moral disapproval. In the end, the Alberta Teachers’ Association reinstated him, but he was transferred to another school district!
In many sports now, participation awards are given to the entire team, so no child feels left out. The whole idea is to protect all children, but I feel that this is a huge disservice. Why should a child strive to improve or put in extra effort when he or she is treated no differently than the child who does nothing? What children need is help and encouragement to develop their skill level so they can achieve success and appreciate what they did, because it was earned by hard work. Sheltering them completely from the real world is not helping them become successful! Real life is hard and no number of awards can shield children from the disappointments and challenges they will eventually face. Failure is the shock treatment of life and with guidance and understanding, we learn more from our failures than we do from our successes!
Another case in point is modern day birthday parties. I was at my six-year-old nephew’s party and all the gifts were sitting there, and after games and birthday cake, the party ended without one gift being opened. When I asked why, I was told, “We don’t want the other children to feel bad because they are not getting a gift or some one’s gift was nicer than theirs, so we will do it in private.” Excuse me! Can we not explain to a child that today is not your birthday but be happy and enjoy your friend’s excitement now, as your turn will come on your birthday, and it is the thought that counts and not the price or size of the gift. Coping with a current child’s feelings with love and an explanation is important as this is how they learn and grow.
As parents and teachers, it is our responsibility to provide love and understanding and direction to our children, but ultimately, it is up to them as to whether they choose to be successful or not. Children need to learn and experience both failure and success, as this is the real world.
Now for the rest of the story. A few years ago, I was driving past a junior high school in Las Vegas and in bold three-foot letters painted on the outside wall of the school gym were these words, “If it is to be, it is up to me.” These ten little two-letter words say it all. Ultimately, it is up to all of us to find our talents (with help) and develop them to the best of our ability. Then, and only then, will we become contributing citizens in the world we live in. In closing, remember that consequences are the only way to change behavior and children learn from this.
Finally, I want to thank my loyal supporters and wish you well in all your future endeavors. In closing, remember to give your child at least one hug a day and tell them you love them!
Lawrence King, Director of Education, Chaparral Community Association
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