Is Social Media Making Us Miserable?

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social media

by Jocelyn Taylor

Forewarning, I really do enjoy social media. I’m a millennial, so the majority of my formative years were spent with some type of social media, be it Nexopia (throwback), Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram. These platforms were built on the idea of bringing people together through increased communication and connectivity. Today, however, many of these platforms create substantial problems for users. Between advertisements, celebrity endorsements, and materialistic posts, these websites do a very good job at reminding us of what we don’t have. But, somehow, these posts seem manageable, possibly because their extravagance creates a barrier between average people, and those in positions of prestige. This is where the low-key insidiousness of social media creeps in. I understand this sounds dramatic, but hear me out…

I feel confident that most active users can relate to this feeling- you add a new photo or post on social media, it gets a like, or a positive comment, and it makes you feel good, right? And in turn, you remember that feeling, and want it again, thus causing you to post more. In my research, I uncovered that this is because platforms are designed to be hard to resist, creating maximum effectiveness. This has been referred to as a ‘social-validation feedback loop,’ which exploits vulnerable aspects of our psychology. Social media utilizes the same neural circuitry that is activated when using slot machines, or cocaine. This concept can be seen in the recent Instagram update that removed the number of likes on posts; as much as we don’t want to admit it, we’re likely better off being blissfully unaware of how many people have liked a given post. These statistics are relatively meaningless, yet, we are invested because they make us feel better, or more powerful, thus maintaining our engagement on the platforms.

So, social media already has us in its grips due to the human need for validation; however, we do not exist in a bubble on any of these platforms. For better or worse, social media has made us more connected with real people from our everyday lives. Remember that girl you met once at a party, or the guy you went to school with in second grade? These two people, who likely never inhabit substantial time in your consciousness, exist in your social media sphere. Why does this matter? Isn’t connectivity the goal of social media? This is where intention lacked practicality; very few people post average, or less positive aspects of their lives on social media. Instead, we consume a curated, picture-perfect piece of a life we don’t know, creating envy or a desire to emulate it.

No one has a perfect life, yet our social media profiles omit these imperfections. This creates the sense of envy, which is often a biproduct of low self-esteem, and can cause physical and mental health problems, in conjunction with difficulty maintaining relationships. Additionally, those curating their content this way strive to create a version of themselves that they deem superior, making it difficult to accept the less-than-perfect person they truly are. This has been referred to as duck syndrome, which refers to the way a duck appears to glide effortlessly through water, while below the surface, their feet are working frantically, invisibly struggling to stay afloat. Social media gives us a false sense of being social, when it really seems there is more harm than good being committed.

Don’t worry, I’m not advocating for the elimination of social media. It provides opportunities for engagement and connectivity that is invaluable. But with the average age of usage consistently decreasing, it’s important to know the problematic aspects that also exist. Social media is a vignette of a life, not the entire picture. Social media is one-dimensional, and portrays a limited view of our lives, making it important to remember all that exists outside of these platforms, since, ultimately, we all deserve lives we would want to give a like to.